Reflection on "Naturally Obsessed"

             I discovered the unique and sometimes altogether crazy band titled The Flaming Lips during my senior year of high school.  One particular thing that attracted me to this great band is that they caught their big break during an episode of Beavis and Butthead.  When Dr. Cooper told me that the documentary we were watching contained a song by them, I thought that at least the film had one positive going for it.  Surprisingly, I thoroughly enjoyed the flow of the "Naturally Obsessed:  The Making of a Scientist" and the honest message about graduate school that it portrayed.  While I find research to be interesting, I have some serious doubts about if I would be happy doing it for a career.

            One aspect that made this documentary personally enjoyable is that I am currently conducting biochemical.  Even though my research is more laid back and primitive than the work being performed by Dr. Shapiro’s team, I had a basic understanding of their goals and problems they were encountering along the way.  Also, my own personal failures in the lab made it easy to relate with the emotions that the characters encountered throughout the filming.  It would be interesting to hear what a person with no science background thought about the film.  While this may be a strong statement, I believe one must have spent time performing independent research that sought to answer something unknown to understand the characters on a deeper level.  For someone like Dr. Cooper who has performed biomedical research, this movie must have struck a major chord and brought back many memories about life in a lab.

            Even though Robert Townley was probably the most interesting graduate student to follow due to his quirky mannerisms, I felt a strong emotional attraction to the student named Kil.  The way he carried himself and invested a great deal of time and effort into his research reminded me of myself.  Also similar to me, the research failures appeared to stay with him for quite some time after they occurred.  One saying of his that I enjoyed was “We don’t learn anything from success.  Rather, we learn from failures.”  He did not say this statement as if to lecture others, but instead, it appeared he mentioned it to try and convince himself of its truth.  While I also hold this motto to be valid, it is difficult for me to come to terms with the reality of the statement.  Watching Kil struggle throughout the filming of the documentary caused me to have second thoughts about being able to succeed in an M.D./Ph.D. program.

            These concerns about my happiness in an M.D./Ph.D. program are not related to being bored with the research.  This is because I find the premise of delving into the unknown to be fascinating.  My downfall in research would likely be caused by investing too much time into my work and making my failures personal. It has always been my intention to start a family and raise my children to the best of my abilities at a relatively young age.  While others may be able to balance a family and graduate school remarkably well, I do not have the skill set to accomplish both tasks at once.  This is the most prevalent reason for having doubts about entering a dual degree program.  I also seriously wonder if my psyche could withstand the constant failures that are inevitable in research.  To circumvent this problem, I would need the proper advisor to encourage me along the way.  Still, something is leading me to toss around the possibility of pursuing both M.D. and Ph.D. degrees.

            Overall, I would strongly recommend this movie to anyone who has even a basic background in the sciences.  It gives a detailed look into the lives of the people who make the discoveries that we read about in the popular media daily.  As far as people considering entering graduate school, it is essential to be exposed to this film.  This is because it gives a look into some of the trying times that will be ahead.  Personally, it caused me to seriously wonder if I possess the skills required to succeed in research.

Documentary watched:
Rifkind, R. & Rifkind, C. (Directors).  (2009).  Naturally Obsessed:  The Making of a Scientist.  Public Broadcasting Service.